Looking for the afterglow
September 17th 2008 16:30
I'm feeling a little lost. There's this empty space in my chest that I've been trying to fill. Unsuccessfully. Maybe it has a hole at the bottom. I'm too tired to catch what falls through though.
There are things I want to do to distract myself from that emptiness. The thing is I know I'd just be distracting myself, so I really wouldn't feel the emptiness being filled. Maybe I think about the hole too much, that's why it's growing bigger. But if I don't think about it at all, I feel like I'm deceiving myself, cheating myself of things that should be better for me.
The lights are twinkling and I know I can enjoy the evening. Why do I choose to retreat into a room and close the blinds? Why don't I take a step and simply enjoy the night?
Maybe because I know the glow of the night is only temporary, and then I'd find myself lost. Again.
*****
How do you deal with that heavy yet empty feeling?
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Comment by Edward 4
The Hospital Blues
Painting in a Cave
Sometimes nothing helps, not friends or writing, then I know I gotta buckle down and wait it out. Wait for it to pass.
Comment by What's Your Story?
What's Your Story?
Big Day Plunge